Dean's Not Fine

God and the Scribe  aka “Every writer needs a good editor" A poem by Jennie  @deanisntfine Written for the #SPNBDAY2018 project    I recently rewatched one of my very favorite "Supernatural" episodes, Robbie Thompson's seminal "Don't Call Me Shurley." It's an hour that resonates with nearly everyone in the SPN Family, but with me in perhaps a different way -- I am drawn to the interplay between the writer and his editor. That our Show puts God, the creator, in the guise of author is something that strikes me as completely perfect. And, as an editor, the relationship is one I'm intimately familiar with. It reminded me of this piece I wrote for this past summer's #SPNBDAY2018 project. I hope you enjoy it. The writer creates. Tiny worlds of intricate dimension. He becomes God. The editor... seeks only truth. The creator is committed to His truth. He's sure of it. His story. His way. The editor challenges that cer...

"I've never had anything this nice." -- Dean Winchester So now we're getting to the tough stuff. Forgive me, my thoughts are still very much jumbled on this. If you'd like, read Part 1 and Part 2 before we get started. While we waited through Hellatus, I had envisioned Rocky's Bar -- in my short stories Welcome to Rocky's and Last Call -- as a place where Michael kept Dean placated by sort of separating him into two halves... splitting the warrior off from the caretaker. The warrior, safely bound somewhere in Dean's mind. The caretaker, content to tend bar in a simple, but pleasant, fantasy. In my stories, Rocky is the absent owner, the guy who gets into scrapes, stirs up trouble, and Dean is "just Dean" -- a guy doing a job, who doesn't want to make waves with anyone. Rocky's turned out to be quite different -- and more than I could ever have imagined. A central question to me, though: Is this a place created by Mi...

Michael: Tell me. Why do you love this world enough to risk your own life? Castiel: Tell me. Why do you hate this world enough to burn it to the ground? How pissed off Michael must have been to find out that God was a close, personal friend of Dean Winchester's. #Supernatural #Nihilism rewatch — Dean's Not Fine #SPN300 💔🥃🥧 (@DeanIsntFine) January 18, 2019 Whoa... Steve Yockey, while doing some emotional, in-depth work with dialog and parallels in "Nihilism," also dropped some serious canon in our laps, didn't he? #Supernatural #Nihilism rewatch Cas is so absolutely done with hearing his brothers whine about their dad. — Dean's Not Fine #SPN300 💔🥃🥧 (@DeanIsntFine) January 18, 2019 I guess we shouldn't be surprised to hear that Michael has a beef with God... But in one little exchange with Cas, Yockey explains what we've all been wondering since the AU was introduced: Multiple worlds... multiple versi...

I set out to write a post that was sort of an elaboration on all the thoughts I had while watching -- and rewatching -- Steve Yockey's masterpiece "Nihilism." Turns out, it's gonna be three posts. Maybe more. So, so sorry. 😁 The thing that stuck with me the most was the ultimate invasion of Michael, to see Dean's thoughts, to spew them back out on the ones Dean loves. We've all had unkind thoughts about people we love. It's human nature. And Dean has been burdened... he's been hurt badly by the people he loves the most. (Yes, he's done his share of hurting too.) He's got to be more conflicted than anyone, in terms of his feelings for Sam, Cas and even Jack. Sam: His burden, his mission. The one who abandoned him. The one who betrayed him. The one who forsook him. Cas: Was meant to be his protector. Betrayed him, failed him, disappointed him more than once. (And remember all those times? "Cas, you child." "Baby i...

Safe Harbor A Supernatural story by Jennie @DeanIsntFine GIFs by Starsmish on Tumblr. “It was a mistake,” Sam said and signed, as Eileen broke down, cracks showing in her armor. She melted into his arms, and he rested his chin atop her head, his hand in her hair. He felt handcuffed, helpless. He didn’t know what he could do, or say, to ease her pain. A mistake. One of hundreds that could happen to any hunter, not to mention any of the very real hazards of the job. Teeth. Claws. Blades. Bullets. Dagon had vanished just as Eileen had taken her shot with the Colt, and the round had slammed into Renny instead. “He wasn’t a monster,” Eileen had said. Sam guessed the jury was still out on that one. Mick had been ready to summarily execute Eileen for her mistake. Luckily, Sam and Dean were there to stop him. And Mick seemed to be having a crisis of conscience. Who knew where that would lead? For now, Sam stilled his thoughts and simply held her. That was something...

Interacting with the amazing Twitter role player @DWImpalaOwner brings me a lot of joy... and, right at this particular time, solace. Posts are split now, with some speaking as Michael and some as Dean. Normally, I like to sneak in a few encouraging words to Dean when he's able to seize control. He and I have a pretty special rapport. But this time it was Michael who seemed eager to chat. The conversation started when the bemused archangel ticked off Dean's list of the wonders of the world... but listed only six. Interesting. According to Dean, in this world the seven wonders of the world are, beer, pie, bacon, coffee, a 1967 Chevy Impala, and Led Zeppelin. — Michael!Dean Winchester (@DWImpalaOwner) June 2, 2018 I felt like I had to chime in. Actually, HE is the seventh. — Dean's Not Fine (Team Broomstick Cowboys) (@DeanIsntFine) June 2, 2018 That touched off quite the conversation about Dean's virtues... about which I am something of an expert! I truly do...

Holding the Fort A Supernatural story by Axy @Aaaahhhxy The bunker was finally silent again. Besides the occasional mechanical thumps of the old building, which, at times, made it feel like it was breathing, everything was quiet for the first time in hours. Castiel sighed. He’d never been such a fan of the crowd and the noise and the waste of energy in small talk. That uneasy sensation was in spite of his daily -- and, for a while at least, permanent -- usage of angel radio, the closest thing anyone could possibly get to being thrown into an ocean of thoughts. Human voices were different. They were tough and solid, almost as if he could touch them. Now, angel radio was nothing but static, and the occasional plea for help. Cas turned it off most of the time, because there was very little he could do to help them, and the knot in his throat caused by the guilt he couldn’t shake off was becoming progressively unbearable. He leaned toward Sam’s laptop, left open on...

Un Jour Parfait, Part 1 A Supernatural story by Axy @Aaaahhhxy Featuring Dean Winchester @dwimpalaowner and Jennie @DeanIsntFine Jennie sighed, eyes closed, facing the sky, her bare feet buried ankle-deep in the cold sand. The wind of a warm, early-spring day caressed her face, as she let it play with her hair and make it messier than it should. The quiet waves slapping at the shoreline made for nice music. It didn’t last, though. Laughter and excited conversation soon covered it all. She chose to keep her eyes shut for one more minute, silently bathing in the unexplainable joy of that day. It felt as if her whole body was tingling with happiness. Knowing that she was responsible for it happening in the first place made her feel more content than she had been in a long, long time. Everything was right in the world. Everything was right in theirs, for once. When she finally looked at them, she felt the most sincere and devastating pinch squeezing her heart. It was on...